Faith, Trust, and... Jesus!

I'm not typically very open regarding my faith, unless the other person expresses they are on the same page, generally for one sole reason: I'm afraid. I'm afraid of people’s judgements, current friends changing their opinions of me, being rejected, people asking me questions I don’t know the answers to yet, but it’s all a learning process, right? Personally, I am constantly wanting to learn new things and grow as an individual. Well, recently, I have gone through a lot of growth, and my strong faith in Christ has been the one guiding light that has kept me afloat through it all. Today, I am done making decisions based out of fear. I have found a spark of courage and inspiration, and I want to share a little of that journey with you.


Moving to New York away from all of my family and loved ones was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Throughout that process I tried to dive into my faith. But it was not an easy feat. I finally found a church I liked, and started going regularly!


I was introduced to New Age spirituality from various sources in my community and everything I heard sounded great! I was yearning for some sort of direction and this was placed directly in my path! I started learning more about it, I bought angel oracle cards (because angels are in the Bible, right?) and I prayed and meditated with them daily. I was a little hesitant with these, so I made sure to pray to God that He would speak to me through the cards. As I got more involved, I spent way more money than I’d like to admit on crystals. I liked the idea of them! My understanding was that they had their own energies that you could essential use to change the energies you were feeling in your life. But something felt off as soon as I purchased them. I hadn’t been to church in a few weeks just because of how my work schedule had been playing out, and looking back, I think that made me desperate for spiritual guidance and more susceptible to anything and everything I was hearing. I researched crystals and Christianity, and quickly discovered these practices were actually warned against in the Bible. When we worship someone or something in the place of God, we are committing the sin of idolatry.


It’s funny how hindsight is 20/20. When I read that information I remembered a few months prior when I started reading into astrology. My first instinct at the time was, why would I pray to the stars to help me when I can pray directly to their creator? I do think astrology fascinating! But, I also strongly believe that God created that beauty and whatever effects they may have on our lives.


I made it a point to go to church the next day. It was a new church I had never been to before, but they offered a 7pm mass that I could make after work, and it was filled with the God’s word and the Holy Spirit which was exactly what I needed!


I’ve also realized that New Age is very focused on self-care, self-love, and self-manifesting your own universe as opposed to respecting the universe God created, and having faith that He is in control of all things, and truly knows what is best for you in this moment. In today’s society we want answers now, so we turn to cards, crystals, and stars. But, the Bible teaches us that we must be patient and good things will happen in God’s time.


“Delight yourself in the Lord; And He will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4

Miracles big and small tend to happen when I focus on living a strong faith based life, and these changes within myself feel more lasting. I am never disappointed or left feeling empty when I surrender my life to God’s will. I don’t want to lose this EVER. And I don’t have to because God is always with us! I’ve read several personal growth books and the ones written from a strong Christian faith always hit my heart the strongest. They also tend to apply directly to whatever I am struggling with in my life. The next book I intend to dive into is the Bible! I am so excited to get a journaling Bible, new highlighters, and start studying on new levels! I can’t wait to see the next steps He has planned for my journey.





Speaking openly about my faith is so new to me, and quite honestly, still terrifying. I have faith that if I share my stories, God will make sure they get to the people who need to hear them.


My intention with sharing these stories and experiences, is to remind you that you are not alone. Everyone has struggles (no matter how well they hide them on social media.) I pray my little messages help guide you on your own faith journey. I pray you find the courage to follow your passions wholeheartedly and find the strength to step out in your faith, fill your life with His spirit and trust that God's got your back!


Marissa Koeller

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Marissa Koeller | New York City | Performer | Coach

© 2020  Marissa Koeller